we may not be doing anything malicious, but we may still be hurting someone. In this case we should not be scolded or punished. And we shouldn't feel attacked when confronted. But knowing it, we can try to change.
I think this can apply to race relations, families, romance, in fact all relationships and factors that affect other people.
When we tell someone they have hurt us, if they didn't realize it, may we be careful not to scold them. But just inform them.
And if someone is telling us we have wronged them, we can remind them we did not know, but that we can now try to change.
Raw Spoon, 7-25-17