I remember C.S. Lewis writing that it doesn't matter too much how much you tithe except that you should be tithing a little bit more than you are comfortable with giving.
And I’ve been thinking about that in other aspects of my life. What things are actually a little bit unpleasant because I'm trying to be more holy, or sacrificial, or generous. Or do I do things exactly the way I'd like to?
I think of this in terms of sexuality. Are there things I'd like to be doing right now that I am choosing not to?
And in how I talk to people. How often do I respond to those closest to me in anger or condescension just because I feel like it? How many of those times am I actually halting something from coming out of my mouth?
Ooh, here's a hard one. Who am I not forgiving because it's just easier to simmer in anger?
I imagine that if I am not a little bit uncomfortable, I am not growing. C.S. Lewis also wrote a book called The Great Divorce about heaven and hell. And his depiction of hell was a city in which anybody could get whatever they so desired. And what that resulted in were a bunch of diminishing souls living as far apart from others that they needed so their desires wouldn't be encroached upon. But in heaven even the grass was so firm and real that it was uncomfortable to walk on. But the more the people in heaven moved toward the high mountains, the stronger and more real and substantial they became. And because they endured through what was uncomfortable they became stronger and holier and more mature, beautiful souls.
Raw Spoon,
9-3-2020
