Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Philip Seymour Hoffman died with a needle in his arm yesterday.

He’s one of those actors we’d all recognize. He did a phenomenal job, usually acting as grumpy characters in movies from The Big Lebowski to Hunger Games.

But I have to ask myself again, how did someone who had reached the pinnacle of the American Dream resort to seeking pleasures so risky that they killed him. But I partly understand; I sense the same draw within myself.

It makes me wonder though.

What if becoming what we want to be...

so we can get what we want to get...

makes us so shallow in the end that many of us would rather medicate ourselves to death?

But what’s the alternative? What if God has something else in mind that he wants us to become. And what if listening to the difficult things he whispers for us to do, like giving up alcohol for a time, putting porn blockers on our computer, or turning off the TV to pursue a scary new passion does something within us.

Maybe it is making us into stronger, more unique and beautiful creatures than we ever imagined we could be. It would make sense that God knows how to make us into something better than we do. Just look at nature. All around us we can see he is vastly imaginative and loves to make deep, rich, and wholly beautiful things.

Raw Spoon, 2-5-14


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